Okay, Chuck Norris isn’t exactly new news. Anyone who’s been on the Internet in the past six years knows all too well about the hilarious Norrisisms that have been floating around. “Chuck can kill two stones with one bird.” “Norris could play Russian roulette with a fully loaded gun and never lose.” “Chuck’s the reason Waldo hides.” And so on and so forth.

Chuck is a bad man, no bout a-doubt it! There’s also an online game where you can test Chuck’s mettle against ninjas! That’s right; ninjas! In Chuck Norris: Attack of the Massacre Ninjas, a lucky player gets to live vicariously through the man who knows no fear, kicking and punching and ripping the hearts from an onslaught of costumed warriors.

I like the game for two reasons: 1) It’s Chuck Norris and 2) you can test out your sadistic side during a lunch break. It’s also easy to control. Simply click and hold the left mouse button to control Chuck’s arms. When ninjas come at you, throw your iron fist of annihilation and watch the bad guys go bouncing. By jumping in the air and holding the left mouse, you can control Chuck’s leg for vicious kicks. You can move left to right, jump and crouch, by using the “W” key (jump), “A” key (back/left), “D” key (forward/right), and the “S” key to crouch.

Overall, the game is very simplistic. Chuck should be able to wreak havoc on at least 12 ninjas at once in the latter levels. But the game isn’t only fun because Chuck can easily kick some tail (in real life, too, just watch Walker Texas Ranger); he also rips hearts out and eats them and stomps the brains out of ninja heads. Just hold your hand over a ninja’s heart, click the left mouse, and rip their heart out. You can then hold it to Chuck’s mouth and he’ll eat it to regain his health. By jumping in the air and landing on a ninja’s head, the brain will pop out and you can use this as a weapon.

The Chuck Norris game isn’t one of the most technologically advanced I’ve ever played, but it is fun. It loads in a basic flash player and doesn’t lag your computer down. All in all, it’s worth playing just to see Chuck eat red meat.

Federal Reserve Chief Ben Bernanke and Secretary of the Treasury Henry Paulson have a truck full of cash, and they need your help. While cruzing down Wall Street in your Cashmobile, you will be presented with banks and businesses that need your help. Your job will be to decide which ones deserve some help, and which ones deserve to crash and burn.

Check it out: TheBailOutGame.us

As shown in the video below, click on the bells to open the secret menu where you wil have the option to add the Squirrely Blow Torch or Peeing Dog features to your ecard.

A lot goes into putting together a game for you. I thought it would be fun to share some of our behind the scenes media so you can see the game in stages that lead up to the final release.

A mock-up of the snowmen bodies and some accessories

Squirrel with a torch

The sketch of the peeing dog.

Recording sound for the torch.

The Game: http://www.ultimatearcade.com/create-a-snowman
UA on twitter: twitter.com/ultimatearcade
Me on twitter: twitter.com/joedotcom
UA on YouTube: youtube.com/user/UltimateArcade
Me on YouTube: youtube.com/user/JoeDotComDotCom

Happy Thanksgiving from all of us at Ultimate Arcade Empire!
 

The Game: http://www.UltimateArcade.com/turkey-attack
UA on twitter: twitter.com/ultimatearcade
Me on twitter: twitter.com/joedotcom
UA on YouTube: youtube.com/user/UltimateArcade
Me on YouTube: youtube.com/user/JoeDotComDotCom

Here is where you come in Fellow Gamers. I know that there are some seriously skilled gamers who frequent UltimateArcade.com. Have any of you solved Conundrum, or do you think you can? I need you to send me a solution so I can show the developers here that we, the gamers on UltimateArcade.com, can solve any puzzle put in front of us.

So, do I have any takers? If you can solve Conundrum, send me an email, a tweet, record a YouTube video, or leave a comment on this blog post detailing how you solved the puzzle. What reward do I offer for your gamer expertise? To the first person that can can successfully convey a step-by-step solution for Conundrum to me, I will be willing to highlight the gamer in an addendum to this blog post, including a photo headshot, short bio, and link to your site, clan, whatever (pending approval of the link by Ultimate Arcade Empire management).

So what do you say UltimateArcaders? Are you up to the challenge? I need your help because I fear in order to earn the solution from the developers here, it is going to take a lot of trips to the coffee shop for bribes.

Thanks for your help, 
-Joe Pine

The Game: http://www.UltimateArcade.com/conundrum
UA on twitter: twitter.com/ultimatearcade
Me on twitter: twitter.com/joedotcom
UA on YouTube: youtube.com/user/UltimateArcade
Me on YouTube: youtube.com/user/JoeDotComDotCom

There are a number of ways to utilize StumbleUpon but the easiest way is to install the toolbar first, located on their main page.  Simply click on the “Get the toolbar” link.  From here, you will be prompted to install an add-on that’s specific to your web browser.

For instance, IE users will get a prompt that looks like the picture to the left.  Click on the Get the “StumbleUpon Add-on for IE >” button and you be asked to Run or Save a “StumbleUpon.exe” application which will assist you in installing the toolbar.  From here, just follow the step by step instructions and you will have the toolbar installed in no time!

Once Installed, you will notice a button near the top right of your toolbars that says “Start Stumbling…”.  If you’ve created a StumbleUpon account prior, you can skip straight to clicking this button. Otherwise, click on “Continue” on the current webpage, to begin customizing your toolbar and creating an account.

In the next screen, a series of check boxes and text boxes to create your account will appear.  By clicking on these check boxes, you are initially telling the Stumble database your general website interests.

Customizing your toolbar is very essential to being a Stumbler; it is through these interests that Stumble’s database knows what types of websites to link to you.  So spend some time checking the interests that suit you.

Now that you’ve checked your general interests, it’s time to begin Stumbling! If you haven’t already, log in by clicking on the “Start Stumbling” button.  A toolbar similar to the one above will appear.  To start Stumbling, simply click on the “Stumble” button to start browsing the websites in the Stumble database.  If you want to go to another website, just click on the button again! Now, if you come across a website that fits your taste, just click the thumbs up “I like it!” button. If you come across a website you don’t like, you can click on the “Stumble” button to go to another website.  If for some reason, you really dislike a website–e.g. it’s slow loading or it’s a form of spam–you can give it a thumbs down.  Once you’ve stumbled a good amount, the Stumble database will begin to thoroughly understand your taste in websites and only send you links that suit your interests.  Remember the more you Stumble, the more the Stumble database will understand you!

There are some important things to note when it comes to StumbleUpon. One, Stumble traffic is “viral” meaning websites in Stumble’s database that receive a number of thumbs up and reviews, will be sent to more people.  This leads to the next note, good content is key! Don’t expect to get highly rated on a website that looks like notepad text.  If your content is good and your fellow Stumblers like it, it will get good ratings and be passed on to others for more ratings and reviews.  Moreover, if you’ve received a good number of ratings, Stumble’s database will favor your website and send it to even more people! This is how newly created but awesome websites can get massive traffic from StumbleUpon; it doesn’t care how much traffic you’re getting already like your typical search engine.  Be sure to fiddle around with the other buttons and every so often, notices will appear around the toolbar to tell you what a specific button does.

Well, now that’s I’ve introduced you to a GREAT social networking tool…. what are you waiting for?? Start Stumbling already!  But before you go, please visit UA’s own StumbleUpon webpage. Feel free to add us as a friend and review our content as well! Till next time…. Later UA gamers!

You know the story, most Halloween parties are pretty mellow when they are just getting started. But once folks have had time to warm up a bit, and the Halloween Punch has been flowing, things tend to loosen up. The idea of the game is to help these monsters find their groove while they try to move to the beat. Using your keyboard, tap the keys at the right time to keep the party rolling.

Each monster has his own environment for him to rock out in. Select: Frankenstein, Dracula, or Wolfman as your dancing hero. As the game progresses users are able to select the songs that they would like to dance to.

Monsters Gone Wild is a simple, spooky way to keep your hand-eye coordination sharp. The next time a monster challenges you to a DDR dance-off, or a Guitar Hero shred-a-thon, you will be ready.

The Game: http://www.UltimateArcade.com/monsters-gone-wild
UA on twitter: twitter.com/ultimatearcade
Me on twitter: twitter.com/joedotcom

UA on YouTube: youtube.com/user/UltimateArcade
Me on YouTube: youtube.com/user/JoeDotComDotCom

I would love to hear any comments on my videos or posts. You can reach me via the comments here, or any of the methods mentioned above.

Enjoy.
-Joe Pine

The game is called A Crow in Hell and it is the story of a crow that must escape from the dark labyrinth of the underworld to find his killer and earn his revenge. The crow must find its way out of the tunnels of hell, avoiding the many traps and dangers lurking in them. Along the way, the crow can collect keys. The keys are used to unlock special challenges that are available in the pre-game menu. Read on for some more screenshots and a video review of the game.

Deep in Hell, one of the first obstacles you encounter is a large rotating spiked wheel.

As you move up in the levels, and closer to the surface, you can see that the background begins to lighten. Also the objects that you encounter change a bit too, becoming less and less link a dungeon.

The game requires a steady hand and a great deal of patience. The environment changes as you move though a screen so you have to be ready to jump fly out of the way at a moments notice if something should make a move at you.

The game is called A Crow in Hell.
You can find it here: http://www.ultimatearcade.com/a-crow-in-hell

Enjoy.

-Joe Pine